


Infiltration

by iluvaqt



Series: His Best Girl [15]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Captain America (Movies), Men in Black (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 02:12:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4204026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iluvaqt/pseuds/iluvaqt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felicity and everyone else try to continue on, without Steve. In some minds he's easily replaced. For Felicity, that will never be the case.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Infiltration

[ ](http://s13.photobucket.com/user/micki34/media/Banners/IMG_74161.jpg.html)

::: ::: :::

"The Avengers Initiative works. Our dynamic is what made us successful. Each member brings a unique skill set to the table. All those DoD suits want is protection for the people. Every day more super villains are crawling out of the woodwork."

"And I wonder why that is?" 

Felicity felt her sarcasm and flinched at the hard edge of her voice. She never thought she'd use pregnancy as an excuse for anything but damn it, her hormones put a monkey wrench in her mental happy place. She was extra crabby in the mornings because of the severe unrelenting nausea and there was no Steve. The times she felt his absence the most where at the worst times, alone in their bed late at night when there was no chance of talking to anyone about how much she missed him. When she had to do her own cooking for the first time in more than a year. Steve enjoyed cooking and spoiling her. He had spoiled her all right, it took her ten minutes how to figure out how to light the damn burner she was that out of practice. She couldn't even fry eggs without burning them now. Although that might be due to her heightened sense of smell triggering her hypersensitive gag reflex. Fuel exhaust fumes, raw meat, eggs and would you even believe it, yogurt, set her off. Bruce, being sweet and thoughtful had made her a breakfast smoothie of berries, banana and yogurt this morning. She'd taken one whiff and had to make a mad dash for the bathroom. Kneeling on the floor, her arms bracing the toilet seat, she stayed there even after her stomach was empty. After washing her face and brushing her teeth for the third time that morning, she didn’t leave for an hour, mortified at her reaction and the awful pain tearing through her chest. She felt like she was either yelling or crying all the time now. She didn't feel like herself and she hated how everyone must be looking at her, with pity.

Felicity gestured aggressively with her hands, hoping she could penetrate that thick skull of his. Tony was kidding himself if he thought this revised Avengers Initiative - The 50 State Initiative - would build the people’s confidence in the superpowered. "Everyone fears what they don’t understand, and you want to churn out all these powerhouse law-keepers. You stir up fear, people retaliate. The threat of violence and stereotyping breeds more violence. You know what would work better? A human and metahuman team. Two of theirs for every one of ours. They’re badass and people mistakenly think they’re metas, but Clint is 100% regular corn-fed American and the only real superpower Natasha has was being able to convincingly play your EA for months without trying to kill you. And you must have conveniently overlooked the reports showing that there is more out of control metahuman related crime now, than there was two years ago. It has spiked at 150%. And I wonder what that coincided with?"

She was really on a runaway train with venting her frustration at Tony, when Thor chimed in with his two cents. “Trained men do not guarantee success on the battlefield, Stark. Numbers matter little."

Tony stopped staring down the feisty blonde and turned to Thor. "Of course you can say that, Thunderer. You single handedly averted that apocalypse in London from that dark elf Malk-beth but even you can't be everywhere at once."

Thor saw Felicity’s point. Having powers meant nothing if they had no discipline or sense of honor and duty. "I did not succeed in my quest alone. Without Eric Selvig, Jane, Darcy and her intern, all could have been lost that day. It is important to trust your comrades, our allies. A man’s character can only forged through fire and battle. Those groups S.H.I.E.L.D has stationed around the country, even Barton would have them for sport." 

It was an ongoing debate between them that out of arrows, Clint was just another trained grunt in a fight. Thor didn’t argue that the man could think on his feet but he wasn't an endurance fighter. Clint was unmatched as a marksman. Felicity would never put Hawkeye and Oliver in a room though, that would just be a disaster waiting to happen. The testosterone, competitiveness, coupled with ego, someone or both would be walking away with a limp. He was a brilliant archer and a tactician, those were his strengths. What Thor routinely ignored was that fact that he was physically superior and so was Steve. In hand to hand combat, either of those two against their resident Archer was never a fair fight. Felicity didn't involve herself though. Men hated women interfering in their arguments over masculine prowess. However rational her reasoning, it would have only irked Clint's ego more. 

"We're teaching these guys how to use their abilities to protect people. You talk like they need to face off against you, to prove themselves."

"You believe Ultron was the last of it? A warlord looms ever closer and Midgard sits at the center of all the realms. An ideal staging ground in which he could launch all his attacks. He wants the Infinity Gems and he will not be deterred in his quest until they are within his grasp. I came to recruit warriors and what I see are petty men fighting amongst themselves. Your grievances, greed and lusts pale in significance if you could see the universe through the eyes of a King. Loki meant to subjugate humanity in preparation for his puppet master, he failed. Have no doubt Thanos will finish the deed. I mean to stop him before he can source the means to accomplish his goal."

"So what do we do? If we mere mortals are so outclassed?" Tony asked tapping his phone against his palm with impatience.

"Felicity addressed the problem masterfully. Stop making enemies out of possible allies,” he said pushing Mjolnir against Tony’s reactor free chest. “Recruit those who have seen battle, Stark, men and women with experience. Like Major Danvers, The Wolverine and the one who calls himself Hercules. They will make your New Avengers. Not children forced into training to escape your prisons." 

Felicity smirked at Thor’s retreating back. He’d left after making his point. Tony eyed her with suspicion. She had a feeling he knew exactly where her thoughts had gone. Steve remembered Logan from the battlefields of WWII. Logan didn’t remember Steve but Steve had a perfect recall and could recount anything when asked. Logan had been staunchly against the Registration and hand started sleeping in the forest around Xavier's school just waiting for some government thug to encroach on the private property. Some Black Ops DoD fools had tried kidnapping metahuman children before and were never seen or heard from again. Logan, a.k.a. The Wolverine - the man who fought like a grizzly bear and had bones made of the hardest metal known to man, might only remember fragments of his past, but he was serious about his loyalty and his duty to protect the kids in his care. She didn’t fancy Tony’s chances of getting Logan to join the Avengers. If Steve or Fury were to ask, that might be a different story. She almost wanted Tony to try anyway. Just so she could stand there with a videocamera. Maybe JARVIS would record it for her, if she asked nicely.

::: ::: :::

Kay left the lights off at night and only had the glow of the fire to guide his way. He was very orderly, so it wasn't as though he needed the light to find anything. "You may choose to work in the shadows but no need to stay in them. I knew you were here the second you set off my window alarm."

"I didn't even see that. Paranoid?" Oliver asked mildly.

"Prepared. Cautious. Experienced. Pick one, son. When will Mr. Diggle be joining us?"

"He won't. He's too visible. Too many eyes on him." Oliver took a seat in the vacant armchair and eyed the brandy Kay gestured to on the table. He wasn’t a big drinker but he could smell the malt from across the room. Must be from good stock. He took a sip and set the tumbler down again. 

"Some would say the same of the playboy, billionaire, philanthropist, Oliver Queen."

Oliver cracked a smile. "I've had a lot of experience going unnoticed although I have a feeling you know all about that or you wouldn't have contacted me. What is it that you want from me?"

“Why the island? What’s in it for you?”

Oliver sat back in his seat and scratched his forehead. He frowned. Why did Kay ask? The island project cost him billions. Sure he had sponsors, and the positive humanitarian appeal mean that his international investors were very impressed by Queen Consolidated’s interest in bettering society but did the financial drain, red tape, negative local press and DoD harassment make up for it? He thought on his answer carefully. It was on the tip of his tongue to just rant every thought he had, but instead he paused and thought over it in depth. “I do it to help people. The government was cutting off benefits to known individuals who didn’t register. Kids were getting pushed out of the education system and whole families were being turned out on the street. It wasn’t just in Starling, it was everywhere. Digg told me what Felicity and Steve were doing but they couldn’t be expected to shelter everyone. So I helped the ones who weren’t high profile targets. The ones the government didn’t really care about because they weren’t considered dangerous or power-houses but still abnormal and therefore subject to the Law. There were kids with powers like aura vision, levitation and limited telekinesis who were only in elementary school. Their parents were without any kind of powers and these kids under the law, would have been taken away and sent to these training camps. So it was register and say goodbye to their parents, or runaway and hope they weren’t arrested. We gave them another option. Hope had Scott Lang break out anyone who had no record, who’d been detained and offered them our help. We offered asylum to everyone who became a target, and their families. The island is big, and covered in jungle vegetation, the facilities aren’t state of the art, but they’ve all made it home. In fact, I’ve heard talk that some of them love it and don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.”

Kay nodded. Seemingly satisfied with something. "In answer to your earlier question. I called you because I needed to tell someone I could trust, in a unique position to rally allies when the war begins.” He noticed Oliver startled and open his mouth to protest, but Kay help up his hand to silence him. “We have been secretly infiltrated in all levels of defense. It's been going on for about a year. Around the time the Avengers unofficially disbanded when Hawkeye took leave and the Hulk went AWOL. The only reason I discovered it was because they tried to have me replaced. I've been in this business a long time and when something feels hinky it's because it is. The Skrulls have evolved in their methods. They've tried invading before. I've been taking orders, posing as one of them since I killed the Skrull who was supposed to replace me in my position at MiB. The plan was no doubt to disable the agency somehow when the time of their attack happens. I have been subtle in my searches in gathering Intel. What I recently learned is that they were the ones who took Steve, not Hydra. Felicity and the Avengers has been hunting down leads that they planted. The man they'll find will more than likely be a Skrull."

Oliver’s eyes widened. Barry, the speedster metahuman from Central City had run into a shapeshifter before. Was it possible the man had been alien and not metahuman. And why would they steal Steve’s body if everyone believed he was dead. Unless he wasn’t. He noted that Kay hadn’t said that the spies had stolen Steve’s body. He said that they’d taken Steve. He didn’t think the man was the type to be in any kind of denial. "He's alive? You have to tell her."

"No," he said firmly.

Oliver bristled. Following Steve’s mock burial, they’d put an empty coffin in the ground, he’d only seen Felicity once, but the change in her in just a couple of weeks had been staggering. "Have you even seen her lately? She's a shell. There is no light in her eyes and she's lost weight..."

"That's normal. Donna went through the same thing. It's called the first trimester."

"It's called grief," Oliver all but growled at him. He launched out of his chair and started to pace in front of the hearth. "If she finds the Skrull and believes it's Steve only to find out later it's an imposter, it'll crush her. She's a strong but right now it looks like she's barely got it together."

"She's tougher than she looks."

"Right, because she's part Asgardian.," Oliver said with a deepening scowl. "She trusts you, she loves you. How do you think she's going to react when she discovers you knew about this."

"She'll understand because she knows what's at stake. This is my duty. At MiB we protect everyone on Earth. It's why in our recruitment requires that we surrender our birth identity and sever all outside ties. Our obligation has to be to more than any one person or family."

"Sever all ties. Don't make me laugh. You're about as objective as a guy with tunnel vision. Everything you've done these past couple of years is to protect her. You even kept Donna's secret. So why not give her hope? If they took his body and they're planning to replace him, there's a chance he's alive. Right? I know that’s what you believe. How does their shifting ability work?"

Kay ran a hand over his face and steepled his fingers before answering. "We're not entirely sure. We've never had a live Skrull to study. They're extremist and faithful in their ideology. It's succeed or die for the cause. Or exile."

Oliver dropped into his chair, staring into the dancing flames. He was never good at subtle. He was the hard edge. Waller had trained him to be her weapon. He would never make a good spy. First, he sucked at lying. Thea and Mari bemoaned over how bad he was at cover stories on a regular basis. Secondly, he didn’t have the patience for a long strategic plan. He was a man of action. He could get things done. Sitting on his hands wasn’t something he could do. He was beginning to see things from Kay’s perspective and he didn’t like it. They had no way of knowing yet how many or who the enemy were. “Do you believe he’s alive?” Oliver asked quietly. 

Kay frowned and watched the younger man for a long moment, wondering if he wanted to know for Felicity’s sake or for his own. He wasn’t blind. He saw the way the man watched Felicity. There was a torch there. How long it had been burning, he couldn't be sure. In any case, he decided sharing his thoughts on the matter wouldn’t do any harm. "I've never met a man more determined than Steve Rogers. He survived being frozen in the Arctic Circle for decades. Got shot to hell by his best friend and dead dropped more than 300ft into the river and left to drown until Barnes had a change of heart. He also shifted several tonnes of concrete while suffering a spinal injury and a serious concussion. The man has everything to live for. My gut says he's alive. And he'll be damn pissed off when he finds out what they've got planned for Earth. If he doesn't find a way back to Felicity himself, I'll eat my favorite pair of shoes."

Oliver leaned forward and rested his fists on his knees. That brief image a selfish part of his psyche had fed him of swooping in to rescue Felicity from a Skrull impersonator when the facade failed, died a quick death at Kay’s challenge. In his heart of hearts, he knew she’d never been his to rescue. Not for many years now. "So what's the plan, if we're not mounting our own rescue?"

"Watch the Avengers, watch your recruits on that island of yours. Something looks or sounds off, take note and be prepared. There's only one way to put down a Skrull. You aim for the head. Once it's dead, it can't hold the transformation."

"There's got to be a better way to detect them than that. Kind of difficult to recover from a headshot if we're wrong."

"Don't trust your instincts, son? Wait till they put a bullet in you first. I'm working on something with a man who's had extensive experience with the race. But he's got his hands full with a divided house and that New Avengers Initiative at the moment but as soon as we have something, I'll get it to you."

"Would it be worth asking John if The Guardians know how to deal with them?"

Kay considered his valid question. "If he can spare the trip. Maybe. Just be sure you can trust him."

"You invited him,” Oliver argued with a snort.

"I was going to get him to drink the brandy first."

Oliver hiked an eyebrow. 

"Truth serum," Kay said unapologetically.

Oliver stood and shook his head. Felicity’s uncle was a piece of work. Probably why he was still kicking. In his line of work the hazard pay must be obscene and the average service record short. "It was good to meet you, sir."

Kay nodded. "You're not a bad apple, Queen. We survive this, I might just pay Captain Lance a visit and find out the real reason why he's gunning so hard for you."

Oliver didn't know what to say to that. There were few people in the world that Oliver couldn't read. Kay was one of them. The only thing he knew for certain was that despite what he said, Oliver knew Kay would never put his job before Felicity.

::: ::: :::

Maria shook her head in disbelief at the agents either rolling on the floor in agony or just plain out cold. It was ridiculous. Not that she would dare try it, after watching all her most athletic candidates break ribs, dislocate bones or almost decapitate themselves trying to catch the iconic Vibranium shield.

The day of Steve's State arranged funeral service, Felicity had put the uniform and the shield on top of the empty casket. General Scudder had caused a scene by protesting that she couldn't do that since it was U.S. Government property. Maria rolled her eyes at the memory. Attack the grieving widow. What an ass. He could claim his priceless Vibranium after the burial, the insensitive prick. James Barnes, a.k.a. The Winter Soldier, a.k.a Scary Psycho Son of a Gun (she only called him that in the safety of her own head) had stepped in and given the man the deadliest of looks, the man had moved aside after mumbling an insincere apology. 

Of course once the U.S. Army had retrieved the shield, and they ordered her to find physical match for Rogers, and suit him up. Maria sighed. It was as though none of the failed Super Soldier Rebirth programs over the last few decades registered in their teeny tiny brains. There was only one Captain America.

"Not looking so hot, are they," a voice behind her noted. "I think I could at least throw it better than that," she said as she watched a jittery, muscular agent make a half effort at aiming for one of the moving test targets.

"This isn't what I want. We can never replace, Steve," Maria said honestly. Not trusting herself or even having the courage to look at her friend in the face. It was only a recent amendment to the Law that allowed Felicity and others like her - non-residents, i.e. aliens - to move around without the threat of immediate detention. For that small concession, Maria was enormously grateful. 

"No, you can't,” she said in a way that brokered no argument. “He's irreplaceable. But I've always understood your position, Maria. We both did. And I know that you've always done everything, within the law to help us. But they’ll never change, they'll keep pushing until they get what they want. So can I make a suggestion?" 

Maria finally met her eyes and hard to swallow and nod because she just didn't have words confronted by the pain she saw in Felicity's eyes. 

"Ask Barnes,” Felicity said, her eyes blinking quickly. “I know for a fact that he'll have no trouble with that," she continued with a pointed nod at the last agent who had just caught a blow to his midsection that looked excruciatingly painful.

"Would he even consider it, let alone not try to shoot me off his doorstep?" Maria never forgot what Felicity looked like the afternoon she picked her up from Bucky's flat. Her friend has been propped against the wall, her face swollen and her skin mottled. There were was a dark bruise in the shape of a hand around her throat and you could actually feel the impression in her tender muscles. Maria had been terrified to touch her further, even more so when Felicity tried to move and had looked up at her with red eyes. All the capillaries in the whites of her eyes had burst. Maria had raced out to the car and got a neck brace from the field medkit in the trunk and forced the woman not to say a word till they could get her proper medical attention. 

"It's who Steve would have wanted," Felicity said firmly. "If anyone was going to wear his uniform, he'd want it to be James."

Maria surveyed the carnage on the deck of the hangered Hellicarrier. It looked like she was out of candidates in any case. "Where's Phil when you need him? He always managed the impossible."

Felicity cracked a smile. "It's his gift."

Maria felt her heart skip at the genuine smile on Felicity's face. She wondered the last time Felicity'd had a reason to smile. It faded just as quickly. 

"He never did get to sign those cards for him," she said sadly, her lips twisting into a frown.

"Oh didn't Steve ever tell you? He gave Phil the uniform he was pulled out of the Arctic in. The Smithsonian let Steve keep the bloodied up suit he stole from the display, so long as he submitted to be measured up and foot the cost for a replica. Steve repaired the damaged suit himself and gave it to Phil after he found out he'd survived Loki's attack."

Felicity couldn't help it. A tear leaked out and before she knew it she was laughing and crying at the same time. It was such a Steve thing to do. Just give away a priceless artifact because he knew someone valued it more than he did. "Stupid hormones," she groused.

Maria's eyes widened. "Felicity?"

"Don't ask,” she said quickly, pursing her lips tightly shut. Her eyes betraying her fear at her loose tongue.

"Won't stay a secret forever," Maria cautioned her.

Felicity shook her head. "For as long as I can, I will. They're not getting anything else from me."

Maria couldn't argue with that. If the DoD knew, they'd probably try to clone it or some crazy mad science thing. She shuddered. She'd erase this entire conversation from the log as soon as she got back to her office. 

::: ::: :::

Her first antenatal appointment and Felicity was freaking out. She had locked herself in the bathroom and she was hyperventilating.

She could not bring herself to leave the small sanctuary. Since registering and promptly disappearing from the spotlight again, she had taken Sam up on his offer to share an apartment and split the rent with him. Even though Tony had offered her, her and Steve's old room in the Avengers tower, apparently he's never use it for anything and it was untouched, she knew her nights would be even worse if she had to sleep in their bed alone.

She had hidden herself away from everyone she didn't trust 100%. Even though Kay had vetted this OBGYN for her, and the time for her appointment was ticking closer and closer, she was still not unlocking that door.

A short knock interrupted her pacing and her gnawing of her bottom lip. She stared at the door willing the person to go away and leave her to fret in silence. 

"Liss, if you don't trust anyone to know about the baby at least let me do a regular health check on you. And I have ultrasound equipment at the tower, so we can check on junior too."

Felicity stopped pacing. So long as he didn't do any internal exams, she actually didn't think his offer was half bad. In fact. It was a pretty brilliant idea.

"I've delivered a lot of babies in my time," Bruce continued speaking through the locked door.

That sold it. She unlocked the door and opened it enough to see him standing outside. "Really?"

"Lost count," he said honestly with a shrug. "Alaska, India, Central Africa, South America, Latveria," he said as he thought out-loud, counting off on his fingers.

Felicity stilled his hands. "Okay. Wow, you've seen a lot of action. I mean handled a lot of pregnant woman. No internals. Gah stop me will you," she growled as his eyes got brighter and his smile grew with her non-deliberate innuendo. 

"Felicity, we'll only do whatever you're comfortable with," he said his lips twitching.

"Did you just…” She glared at him for his teasing. “I thought your job was to make me feel comfortable not make me what to slap you."

Natasha appeared next to them and hooked her arm through Felicity's. "Come on, baby mama. I want to see the color palate I got to work with."

"Might be a little early to tell yet, Tasha."

"There's no manual here. Half-Asgardian, Super Serum infused,” Natasha reasoned. “Kid might be ready in a week."

Felicity goggled at her and froze mid-step. She yanked at Bruce's arm. "That's not actually possible, right? My mom carried me for the regular gestation. I was actually a week late. Born 41 weeks. After seriously long labor...." She trailed off, that feeling of paralyzing terror starting to take over again.

"Felicity, I was kidding around. Your baby is going to be perfect, beautiful, healthy and totally normal. You might even end up with two."

"Two? What do you mean two?"' She felt faint and her brain felt sluggish. 

"You know twins? Multiples foetuses. It's more rare in unassisted pregnancies, but there's also triplets and quads." Behind Felicity's shoulder Bruce was making weird gestures at her but Natasha ignored him. Information was always valuable. Forewarned is forearmed and all that. Come to think of it, where were all Felicity’s pregnancy books? She can’t say she saw a single baby-related book in the whole townhouse.

Felicity let Natasha’s words sink in, before the fact that she hadn't had lunch seemed to catch up with her and she swayed once before losing it entirely.

Bruce had her before she even dropped an inch, anchoring her in his arms and gently moving her to the sofa. "That was me trying to say, she's not ready, Natasha. She's barely keeping it together. Too much too fast. I was just going to do a blood test and get her blood pressure today. Save the heart beat monitor for tomorrow or in a couple days and set up the ultrasound for when she actually starts measuring closer to twelve weeks. Right now the only thing she's showing is how much weight she's lost."

Natasha grew quiet and thoughtful. "So we need to get her eating and keeping things down. What worked for her mom?"

"You know, I don't think anyone's thought to ask," he smiled at her. "Tasha, you're amazing. Call Donna and then if you could stock the kitchen? You know Liss, she'd never ask and she barely goes out unless one of us go with her."

"I'll take care of it," she kissed him quickly and then brushed the back of her fingers along Felicity's pale cheekbone. "She isn't coping really, is she?."

"We'll find him," Bruce said firmly.

"Bet your ass we will. Barnes and I have another location thanks to the matrix Vision rebuilt before Thor took him to Asgard. We’re prepping for a mission to hit the base. Want to come with?"

Bruce shook his head. "I don't think I'm ready yet."

She squeezed his shoulder. "It'll happen. I won't stop asking," she said with a wink. "Rather have you watch my back."

"Me too. But right now, I don't trust myself to not make a mess. He...I would never want to hurt you, even by accident."

Natasha nodded. "We got this one. One of these days, you'll trust yourself as much as I do."

::: ::: :::

Felicity sat curled on the sofa, joined by Jane, Darcy, and Natasha in varying states of slothness, half empty pizza boxes scattered around and empty soda cans and water bottles on the coffee table.

“Darcy, you’re a gourmet goddess. I seriously hope this agrees with junior because this has to be the best food I’ve smelled and eaten in weeks! The only other things I can manage to stomach have been saltines and candied ginger, which my Mom swear by.”

Darcy gave her a smug grin. “I was at a college event in Santa Barbara a couple of years ago and we were starving by lunch and just hit the first pizza place we could find. A totally adorable nerd we just hooked up with ordered the pear and gorgonzola pizza and I mean come on fruit on a pizza? I don’t eat fruit at all, but my girlfriend dared me to try it, so I did. Gotta be the only fruit I eat ever.” She gave Felicity a toothy smile and snapped a picture of Natasha and Felicity curled up against each other. “That’s going on my Instagram because no one will ever believe Black Widow can veg out.”

Natasha stuck her tongue out at Darcy. “If I don’t like the picture, I’m having Felicity delete your account. Fair warning.”

“You can’t do that!” Darcy cried. “So unfair.” She sent a narrowed glare at Felicity. “I bought you gastronomic sustenance. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”

Felicity snorted and snickered before reaching for another slice of pizza. “You two can battle this out alone. I’m Switzerland. And don’t threaten the pregnant woman with food or withholding of said food. That’s got to be an unwritten law.”

Darcy slouched against the over-sized lounge cushions and pouted. She deleted the picture she’d been about to upload, but secretly kept it in her phone album. Natasha scared her a little. She was more afraid the woman might sneakily steal her phone and wipe it clean or just vanish it all together. She was a super-spy after all.

Jane smiled happily at the group, crowded in a the tiny living room and hugged her hot coffee mug between her hands. “I love this. We should definitely do this more often.”

“If you come bearing food that my nose approves, come around any time,” Felicity said with a satisfied groan. A full stomach was bliss. The company was pretty sweet too. She snuggled in closer to Natasha. The woman’s short red hair tickling her neck. Girlfriends were the best. She really didn’t know how she’d be coping without them.

::: ::: :::

Felicity was in sweats, a loose t-shirt and a sports bra. Everything else in her wardrobe was starting to feel too tight, and if she felt uncomfortable that was a sure fire bet to end with her hugging the porcelain throne. Begging for a reprieve and mercy.

“Tasha, I haven’t seen the inside of a gym for weeks. I haven’t crawled out of the bedroom in weeks. Did I mention I’ve only started having teeny, tiny burst of energy? I actually didn’t fall asleep at the laundromat yesterday. It was only Sam calling me to check up on me that I even woke up that last time. I almost burned all my smalls.”

“Felicity, Bruce says it’s perfectly fine for you to be doing your normal routine. He consulted with a few OBGYNs to be sure, and it’s actually good for your birth and recovery if you keep up a regular workout.”

Shoulders slumping, Felicity reluctantly started her stretches. “Ride my ass, why don’t you. Slave driver.”

Natasha bounced on the spot and did a few burpees before she gave Felicity a syrupy smile. “Exercise releases endorphins. Endorphins make people happy. Happy people don’t kill people.”

“Sometimes I worry about how much pop culture you randomly reference.” Then she paused mid-stretch. Actually she shouldn’t be surprised, she thought with a mental grimace. Natasha had a stolen childhood to make up for. At least she was embracing her freedom in a healthy way. She could have chosen to hunt down every one of her abusers and kill them all for what they’d done to her as a young girl. Instead she was devoting herself to being a protector of the innocent and an instrument for justice within the law. And Felicity couldn’t be more proud of her for her choices.

Natasha watched, reading every emotion that had flickered in her eyes. It’s why she adored Felicity. The truth and her heart were always right there for anyone to see. There was never any pretense. She understood why Steve had fallen so hard for her. She was everything their world tried to drill out of them as soldiers, spies, assassins - compassion, kindness, empathy, love and hope. Sentiments like that were a sure fire way to get you killed and fail your mission.

“Come on, Valkyrie,” Natasha said in a teasing tone. “Show me something fierce.”

Felicity took a fighting stance and raised a worried eyebrow. “Are you sure it’s safe?”

Natasha nodded. “There’ll be no midsection shots from me and we’re on the mats. Just make sure you don’t overextend okay. Your muscles have increased blood flow and they’re more relaxed. Keep your core tight and remember to counter balance.”

Ten minutes in, she realized how much Natasha had accounted for her pregnancy body. Natasha’s counter moves were barely touches, merely deflections and if anything, she was correcting Felicity’s stance like she had done when they’d first started training, instead of using her weak points to her advantage. Felicity appreciated what she was doing. She was teaching her how to better defend herself now that her body was going through rapid changes.

An hour later, Felicity was doing her best to walk off the workout rather than lay flat on her back, which is what she dearly wanted to do. Probably not a good idea. She might never get up. “Thank you, Natasha. I didn’t realize how much I needed this until now. I’m dead on my feet but I feel awesome. Is that weird?”

Natasha grinned. “Only our special brand of weird. Come on, I have a scientist to steal out of lab.”

Felicity chuckled and headed for the showers with Natasha.

:: ::: :::

This was the fourth suspected Hydra base they'd infiltrated in the past few weeks. It helped that Bucky was starting to remember more about his years as the Winter Soldier and those were some of the first locations they had looked into. Most of the facilities had been decommissioned a long time ago but just being there seemed to set off even more memories. So the day they found Steve, Barnes was so familiar with the set up that no one questioned how they should proceed.

Steve was in a cryochamber almost exactly like the one Bucky had been in while on ice. There was also an indoctrination and electrotherapy chair set up nearby. Hydra must have been laughing when they set this up. They lost the Winter Soldier but they gained Captain America. The man responsible for foiling their end game in the last inning.

The energy the entire flight back had been unbelieveable. By the time the jet had landed on the roof, the tower had been inundated with visitors. The Avengers Tower hadn't been such a buzz of activity since the house party, in their first year. Maria, General Scudder and Dr. Cecilia Reyes, oversaw the thaw process. Rhodey and Barnes was on standby in case they needed to subdue him and Natasha was doing her best to keep Felicity from going out of her mind with anxiety.

Felicity couldn’t sit still. And she couldn’t even stress eat because the tower was all out of her favorites and she didn’t dare chance just raiding the fridge since her stomach was already a barrel of nerves and she didn’t want to be locked up in the bathroom once Steve actually woke up. 

“What can I do?” Natasha asked her quietly. Watching Felicity was making her nervous. Black Widow didn’t do nervous. If she got that antsy itchy feeling, she just started shooting things. The range was out right now because Felicity wasn’t going anywhere. She hadn’t moved from Bruce’s lab since they brought the chamber down. She could see Dr. Reyes' lab through the thick plexi-glass and she didn’t want to leave. She wanted to be there when he woke up.

The thaw process was slow. They had to warm the inside of the body and the same time they warmed the surface of his body. That meant running the chamber's dialysis to drain his blood, which had probably been infused with some special compound to keep it from shredding his veins and tissue. And then slowly raise the core temperature and the surface temperature in tandem, while reintroducing the warmed blood. They were at the three-hour mark now. Core temperature was almost within normal range.

No one was surprised when he took his first breath on his own, and his heart just started beating. What did surprise everyone, however, was the first words that had come out of his mouth, “My name is Steve Rogers. I am Captain America. Social Security number…”

The enemy had broken, America's Super Soldier.

::: ::: :::

Bucky tried to explain it to her while Sam and Natasha sat either side of her in a quiet show of support.

Felicity was still reeling over the fact that the man who wore her husband’s face, still bore the scars of his shooting on his chest, looked exactly as she remembered him, but couldn’t remember her. Didn’t show an ounce of recognition at seeing her in his room. She was a stranger.

Maria had been sympathetic while Scudder had actually looked smug. She could have punched him clear through the lab glass window if Bruce hadn’t put a staying hand on her shoulder. 

“Steve?” she said her voice hitching. She moved closer to reach for him but he actually startled, like he was afraid of her.

“It’s probably part of the conditioning,” Natasha said gently. “They try to dehumanise you, to break you, make you more pliant and susceptible to their handlers. His responses are similar to what Vision saw in Sharon Carter’s mind. Only whoever released her, built a mental block around her experience so no one would suspect she’d ever been held captive.”

“Sir,” Steve said addressing the General. He was the only person in the room wearing a uniform and insignia he could identify. “Was I rescued? How long was I a POW?”

“You were held captive by Hydra, son. Just rest easy for now. Once your doctors say you’re fit for duty, you can report to me,” General Scudder said with authority.

Felicity bristled. “I am his power of attorney and he’s been through hell. I’ll say when he’s fit for duty and I’ll determine who handles his care,” she growled threateningly at the man.

Scudder blinked at her and folded his hand neatly behind his back. “Steve Rogers is an officer of the U.S. Army. He will be seen to by our doctors and no court is going to overrule us here.” He gave a pointed look at her midsection. “Besides I believe you have more pressing concerns, yes?”

Felicity saw red, she launched herself at him. “You son of a bitch.” She felt Natasha bodily dragging her back. She hadn’t even got to punch the smirk off his face. “You stay away from my family. I will end you!” she screamed at him, as she was pulled out of the room.

Bruce and Natasha were struggling to hold her. They didn’t want to hurt her by holding her too tight but she was fighting to free herself like a wildcat. 

“He’s a four-star General, who has the ear of the Secretary of Defense and sits on the oversight committee for S.H.I.E.L.D. and every other intelligence agency in this country. Next to Ross, he’s a tiger shark. You don’t want to make him an enemy,” Bruce seethed at her. “Liss, come on. Think. Don’t let the anger take over. Anger makes us stupid.”

Felicity deflated quickly. She hated the idea that she could ever be stupid. But Bruce was right, anger clouded the brain. She needed to be calm and think. She needed a plan. Right now General Scudder would probably be doing everything to make sure that Steve never laid eyes on her again.

“The Army doesn’t get him until he has all his memories back,” she said firmly. “He has to be of sound mind and body. We’ve got to find military doctors that wouldn't stand for top dog pressure and will stand by their ethical code like pitbulls.”

“That’s our girl,” Bruce said proudly. 

::: ::: :::

Days turned into weeks, and there was no change. Steve was making new memories and retaining them with no trouble. At this rate even the doctors they had found would be clearing him fit for duty any day now. The latest reports concluded that the time in captivity was probably too traumatic for his brain to recall at the moment. The most conservative estimate had him returning to active duty in a month if he continued to show progress in his therapy sessions.

He was staying in guest room in the Avengers Tower. Bucky had moved in too. He didn’t remember Bucky either, and considering he and Steve had been friends since childhood, Felicity knew this couldn’t be any easier for him either. She actually wondered if Bucky felt guilty for Steve’s condition. It was insane. He hadn’t been responsible for Steve’s capture but Felicity didn’t argue with what she could see. And she saw guilt on James’ face everytime he passed Steve’s room.

“Why?” she asked finally, when she’d seen him glance away when he saw Steve laugh at something Tony had said.

“Because since he rescued me from Hydra in the war, I’ve always been jealous of him. I was the one protecting him. I was bigger than him, more popular, I’d served longer and then all of sudden he's Captain America and he was the one leading and protecting me. It's part of what fed into the hatred and the programing later. I was envious and it ate at me. Now he’s broken. He doesn’t know who he is. He suffered the same as I did, and I can’t shake this feeling in me because I know part of me wished he had. And this is the result. I took your happiness after all.”

Felicity didn’t know what to say to that. She was shocked. Rattled that Bucky had actually felt that way long before Hydra had stolen his humanity and turned him into a cold-blooded assassin. She had never had that kind of love/envy relationship with anyone. Bucky let out a breath and walked away while Felicity blinked back pained stinging in her eyes. She glanced between Steve and his forgotten best friend and wondered just how much more the evil in the world would take from them.

::: ::: :::

**Elsewhere**

Steve scratched at the hair on his chin, it was a full beard now. The growth of scruff in the first few days had been beyond annoying. He’d never gone without shaving. Even in the war days he’d had his razor in his pack. He didn’t even want to consider the state of his hair. It routinely flopped into his eyes and tickled his neck. There were a lot of adjustments he had, had to make over the lack of normal comforts.

Here they fed him once a day. They rolled a canteen of water into his force-field cell. If he didn’t roll it back out when it was empty, they just didn’t bother with him. Two days of no water, and he yelling, realized no one was going to talk to him or cared if he died of thirst. So he had just thrown it out of the meal slot and waited. The next day, the canteen was back, accompanying his morning meal. At least he assumed it was morning. There were no windows. He didn’t know where he was or what time of day it was. He’d kept track of the days by scratching at the wall with the spork like utensil they gave him to eat with. 

It took him a week to figure out the lavatory doubled as a hygiene unit. It vacuumed waste from the bowl like it did on commercial airliners. The pulse ray, whatever it was they used to kill surface bacteria, it felt weird anyway, was their version of a shower. Whenever he stepped behind the screen of glass, the surface went opaque and he could strip down and use the ray in relative privacy. When his clothing started to feel gross, he’d put them under the ray too and it didn’t help with the skin build up but it stopped the smell.

The sleeping mat was surprisingly comfortable. It felt like a cross between a thin air bed and a foam bed roll, the ones they had while roughing in survival training at Camp Pendleton. When he wasn’t sleeping, he exercised. It helped him recover. When he’d first woken up in his cell, he’d felt the raw scars on his chest and he remembered just how he’d gotten them. It had taken a week for him to be able to even attempt a wall press-up. He’d started slow, and only pushed so far as his body was ready for. He finally let like he was close to peak again. Or as good as he could manage with no equipment whatsoever. He could lift his body weight on one arm, and he could 100 burpees in less than 5 minutes and not feel like his chest was about to explode. He called that progress. 

They obviously had special lights in his cell, because he knew otherwise his body would be feeling the lack of vitamin D by now. He hadn’t seen sky or daylight in months but he knew that there had to be some kind of UV exposure. The mark of his wedding band was fading. The day of Peggy’s funeral, he’d worn it around his neck on a chain. The only time he took it off was if they were together in public. Their marriage was their own business, no one elses. He’d torn a strip off his sleeve and tied it around his finger. There were no reflective surfaces so he hadn’t seen his own face for months but that mark more than anything reminded him of who he was and who was waiting for him. Felicity would never give up on him. She would fight for him. And he would do his best to find his way back to her. 

::: ::: :::

Felicity nervously clutched at the blue scrubs Bruce had, had her put on. He was holding the wand in his hand and a bottle of gel in the other. She glanced at the dark monitor and squeezed her eyes shut for a long moment, telling herself not to cry and to just breathe. 

“Are you ready?” he asked gently.

Chewing down hard on her bottom lip to keep it from wobbling, she opened her eyes and blinked up at him. She nodded quickly and lifted her top. The gel was cold just like he’d warned her but all too soon a wub, wub, wooshing sound coming the ultrasound machine cancelled every other concern from her mind.

A shape emerged from the grayish-blank void and she saw her baby. Their baby. 

Tears burned in her eyes and she tried to hold in her emotions but they burst out of her in a sob. She gripped her shirt in a white knuckle grip in one hand and held onto Natasha’s hand with the other till she felt resistance. She needed that anchoring feeling right now, of someone holding her back. She was being swept away by the image of that tiny being growing inside her and she was terrified. This was a reality she couldn't face alone.

“Strong heartbeat. And very active. Can you feel that?” Bruce asked. “Looks like hiccups.”

Felicity shook her head and stared unblinkingly at the screen, she could feel a bout of hiccups of her own coming on, which how hard she was struggling not to give in and cry her heart out.

“Some mothers start feeling movements around 14 weeks. You’re not far off. With how active this little one is, I wouldn’t be surprised if you feel a kick or two soon.”

“He looks at me now. He doesn’t avoid me but he still has no idea who I am,” Felicity said, voice cracking. “I can’t even share this with him, because it wouldn’t mean anything to him.”

Natasha held Felicity’s trembling shoulders and Bruce wiped away the gel from her skin and shut down the machine. They quietly embraced her and held her until she was all cried out. No one argued the nutritional value of her meal when she said she was eating a whole tub of Ben & Jerry’s after dinner. 

Later that night, when they’d roped the returning New Avengers team into watching a Star Wars Clone Wars marathon, Bruce had to bite his tongue following Natasha’s warning look when Felicity fell asleep against Bucky, who was wearing Steve’s uniform after another successful, peacekeeping mission. Maybe he could quietly suggest that Felicity spend more time away from the tower with Natasha, someplace else. Felicity had moved back in when they'd found Steve. She'd been staying in their old room. 

Natasha and Carol didn’t get a long, and honestly, neither did Felicity. In her attitude, sometimes Carol reminded them both a little too much of Tony. She was confrontational and didn’t mind stepping on toes, sometimes everyone's in one breath. Male figures of authority, she could barely tolerate having been overlooked and undervalued as a child, and then hung out to dry by NASA when she’d failed to mount proper defensive measures against extra-terrestrial threats, .i.e. the Chitauri, and Malekith, and a few others Kay had mentioned that the MiB had wiped from official record. Carol. a.k.a. Captain Marvel’s powers were phenomenal and occasionally, out of control. Felicity didn’t feel comfortable around the woman. Putting a bit of distance between Barnes and Felicity, not to mention Felicity and the still amnesiac!Steve would probably be a good thing too.


End file.
